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Tammy..short for tamberine
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[03 Mar 2006|05:20pm] |
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HI!
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[13 Sep 2005|08:07pm] |
want everyone who reads this to ask me 4 questions. Any 4, no matter how personal, dirty, private, or random. I have to answer them honestly. In turn, you have to post this message in your own journal, and you have to answer the questions that are asked of you.
ALSO : yeah you have to reply answering your own questions when I reply!
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| bummed it off of ezekiel |
[06 Sep 2005|09:50am] |
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name: Tammy nicknames: timmy, chapiz, stimpy,tamifer..tamilia...etc parents: Beatriz and miguel age: 18 birthday:Oct 10 eye color: dark brown siblings: kym and mikey how do you describe yourself:idiot what's your sign?:libra contacts?: no
Have you ever.....
fallen for your best friend?:no made out with JUST a friend?: no been rejected?:mmm yeah i guess been in love?: yeah been in lust?: not that i know of used someone?: yes been used?: yeah.. cheated on someone?:no been kissed?: yes done something you regret?:not yet
Who was the last person......
you touched?: kym you talked to?: argento you hugged?: kym you instant messaged?: argento you kissed?:my love you yelled at?: mikey you laughed with?: mikey and kym you had a crush on?: my love who broke your heart?: my love
Do you...... color your hair?: not anymore have tattoos?: yes a cow piercings?: only my ears have a girlfriend/boyfriend?: yes .. own a webcam?: i think we do .. ever get off the damn computer?: yeah... sprechen sie deutsche?: ...yes... .. habla espanol?: si
What are......
you wearing: pjs current mood: awkward current music: novelas current taste: of...? current hair: nappy current annoyance: mikeys face current smell: my farts current thing I ought to be doing: ..beating mikey current desktop picture: kyo and iori favorite band/group: the mars volta current book: scud head current dvd in player: mmm my wild arms 3 is in there current worry: carlos current crush: my love current favorite celebrity: vinny jones
Favorite......
food: chicken drink: water color: purple shoes: adidas candy: pre diabetic animal: birds tv show: family guy samurai champloo class: art vegetable: carrots fruit:pears
Are you......
understanding: i try open-minded: hope so arrogant: at times insecure: all the time interesting: probably not hungry: no friendly: depends if i'm moody smart: maybe moody: not that time of the month childish: heh yeah independent: not completely hard working: ehhhh..sometimes organized:only in a time way healthy: NOOOOO emotionally stable:ehhh i try shy: sometimes difficult: probably bored easily: mm not really thirsty: a little responsible:hope so sad: not really happy: mmm alittle trusting: no talkative: depends who u are original: naahh different: no just there unique: i wouldn't say so lonely:not really a naked bum who likes to run around naked: old guy taking a dump
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| ::sigh:: |
[24 Jul 2005|11:20pm] |
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been a long road to follow been there and gone tomorrow without saying goodbye to yesterday are the memories I hold still valid? or have the tears deluded them? maybe this time tomorrow the rain will cease to follow and the mist will fade into one more today something somewhere out there keeps calling am I going home? will I hear someone singing solace to the silent moon? zero gravity what's it like? am I alone? is somebody there beyond these heavy aching feet still the road keeps on telling me to go on something is pulling me I feel the gravity of it all
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| she rises from the dead |
[13 Jun 2005|05:28pm] |
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ehhhh is anybody there....heeeeeeeeeeeelllllllllllllllllllloooooooooooooooooooooo...sorry for not updating for like the last couple of eternity..well not much has happened..i moved in with my love..we're doing good, i sometimes miss my family..and argento...::sniff::...hahahaha..anywho...i don't really have much to say..i joined self defense and got my yellow belt..and i'm getting fat..nooooo..i'm going to the gym today so i guess it's gonna be ok...welll..i promise i'll post more and more..(like u guys care)..
...i hate paying rent...
...tammy...
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| rip my flesh off |
[15 Mar 2005|02:07pm] |
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The ocean floor is hidden From your viewing lens A depth perception Languished in the night All my life, I’ve been Sewing the wounds But the seeds sprout A lachrymal cloud
Niño preparate (Child, prepare yourself) Que vas sufrir (You're going to suffer) Niño preparate (Child, prepare yourself) Salte veneno (Get out the venom) Niño preparate (Child, prepare yourself) Salte de aqui (get it out of here) Niño preparate (Child, prepare yourself) Labios temblando (Trembling Lips) Niño preparate (Child, prepare yourself) Salte veneno (Get out the venom) Niño preparate (Child, prepare yourself) Salte de aqui (Get it out of here) Niño preparate (Child, prepare yourself) Brincan los cuerpos (The bodies get excited) Vas a sufrir (you're going to suffer)
My nails peel back When the taxidermist ruined Goose stepped the freckling impatience All the brittle tombs Five hundred little q’s I’m splitting hairs to Match the faces All night long I’ll hunt for you Let me show you what I mean Sangre (blood) Sonando (ringing) De rabia nací (from rage i was born)
Now this train don’t lie An abortion that survived A lineage of Bastard mastacation All the severed proof Talons scratch my suite These are the feathers That replace them All night I’ll hunt for you Let me show you what I mean Sangre (blood) Sonando (ringing) De rabia nací (from rage i was born)
Who do you trust Will they feed us the womb Chrome the fetal mirage Will they feed us the womb I found the remnants Of a crescent fang It cleaned my wing Down to the bone Umbilical syllables Left to decode There was no cradle I can taste it Come on now
All night I’ll hunt for you Let me show you what I mean Sangre (blood) Sonando (ringing) De rabia nací (from rage i was born)
Who do you trust Will they feed us the womb Chrome the fetal mirage Will they feed us the womb Bring me this plague She took a drink Those nicotine stains On his every word My scavenger quilt Will only hide the truth Bring me Bring me this plague I count the days to find What was left behind Only these names I clutch Will lead me to my home Somehow this river marks A wrinkle hand in mine And everyday that parts The water into two Mothers and feathers start To drown the living proof I can’t remember these lakes of blood Wrapped in a blanket There sweats a cut Who do you trust Will they feed us the womb Chrome the fetal mirage Will they feed us the womb
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| i'll naw at these chains if i have to |
[06 Mar 2005|05:04pm] |
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Something inside the cards I know is right Don't want to live Somebody elses life This is what I want to be And this is what I give to you Because I get it free She smiles while I do my time
I could die for you Oh this life I choose
I'm here to be your only go-between To tell you of the sights These eyes have seen What I really want to do is Turn it into motion Beauty that I can't abuse You know that I'd use my senses to You can see that It's only everywhere I'd take it all and then I'd find a way to share
Come along and go Along with me Wander with me yo It's all for free
I could die for you Whatchu wanna do Oh this life I choose
Come again and tell me Where you want to go What it means for me To be with you alone Close the door and No one has to know How we are
Come along and go Along with me Wander with me yo It's all for free
I could die for you Whatchu want to do Oh this life I choose
i told my mother that i am moving out in april..and she told me that i'm trying to live someone elses life..that i was only leaving because melissa brain washed me into it..that i can't make my own decisions yet..because i'm still too imature..oh yeah ..i forgot to tell u guys..i'm movin out..anywho..happy birthday kym..20 years older one day shorter..i'm sorry big sister i didn't mean to tell her on your birthday..i'm really sorry..love i'm sorry i hung up so fast..i was telling mom about my situation..she says my reasons aren't good enough for leaving..oh well..i was never good enough to you so this isn't any different..i don't have to be good enough for you..not anymore..and so that song up there is for my mom and for my love and for all of you..alittle for everybody..::sigh::..well it's back to working on the comic and my license
..i feel like i'm gonna start a new life..
..in 3 weeks...
...tammy..
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[24 Feb 2005|11:51am] |
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I'M GONNA START A WEB COMIC !!!!!!!!!!
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| ::sniff:: |
[21 Feb 2005|11:12pm] |
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I can't sleep tonight Everybody saying everything's alright Still I can't close my eyes I'm seeing a tunnel at the end of all these lights
Sunny days Where have you gone? I get the strangest feeling you belong Why does it always rain on me? Is it because I lied when I was seventeen? Why does it always rain on me? Even when the sun is shining I can't avoid the lightning
I can't stand myself I'm being held up by an invisible man Still life on a shelf when I got my mind on something else
Sunny days Where have you gone? I get the strangest feeling you belong Why does it always rain on me? Is it because I lied when I was seventeen? Why does it always rain on me? Even when the sun is shining I can't avoid the lightning
Oh, where did the blue skies go? And why is it raining so? It's so cold I can't sleep tonight Everybody's saying everything's all right Still I can't close my eyes I'm seeing a tunnel at the end of the lights
Sunny days Where have you gone? I get the strangest feeling you belong Why does it always rain on me? Is it because I lied when I was seventeen? Even when the sun is shining I can't avoid the lightning Oh, where did the blue skies go? And why is it raining so? It's so cold Why does it always rain on me? Why does it always rain on....
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| all i can hear is the sad sounds of these violins |
[21 Feb 2005|07:58pm] |
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X soundtrack |
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finally a real update..no lyrics..heh..sorry i couldn't describe myself any other way..sorry..heh seems thats all i'm good for these days huh?...hmm anywho..things are kinda ok..i feel crappy right now..oh well i'll get over it..how can you say "but what i think doesn't matter" when u know it does..u say it's partially my fault..maybe it is maybe it isn't..what do i think?..it doesn't matter...heh that last line makes me sound angry..but i'm not..i'm just confused..a part of me says it's my fault and another tells me it's not..a classic battle don't you think?..i can't help but dwell on it..i guess another thing i'm good at..well..what do i do now??..i don't really know..i tried..but maybe she's right maybe i didn't try hard enough..maybe i did..see there's the other side..how am i not suppose to feel bad knowing that you feel like it's partially my fault?..i feel ignorant..because it probably is my fault..because everything is my fault..everything bad is my fault..everytihng is beautiful as long as i'm not there..::sigh:..i don't even know if i was being sarcastic right now..ehh..i still can't describe myself with words..none of this seems to make sense to me..but i'll post it anyway and be on my merry way...i guess..
..maybe a picture would've helped...
...i know the music does...
...tammy...
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| HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA good stuff but where's argento? |
[17 Feb 2005|02:31pm] |
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value="clampprodigy" size="20" maxlength="64"></td></tr><tr bgcolor="#6699CC"><td align="left" valign="middle" style="color: #FFFFFF;">Favorite Color</td><td align="left" valign="middle"><input ... ></td></tr><tr bgcolor="#6699CC"><td align="left" valign="middle" style="color: #FFFFFF;">Favorite Food</td><td align="left" valign="middle"><input ... ></td></tr><tr bgcolor="#6699CC" height="5"><td colspan="2"></td></tr><tr bgcolor="#336699"><td align="left" valign="middle" style="color: #FFFFFF;">In an out-of-state prison</td><td style="color: #FFFFFF; font-weight:bold;" align="left" valign="middle">ryan_kahuna </td></tr><tr bgcolor="#336699"><td align="left" valign="middle" style="color: #FFFFFF;">Still living at home</td><td style="color: #FFFFFF; font-weight:bold;" align="left" valign="middle">emeraldraco</td></tr><tr bgcolor="#336699"><td align="left" valign="middle" style="color: #FFFFFF;">w/ children</td><td style="color: #FFFFFF; font-weight:bold;" align="left" valign="middle">ninasgotagun</td></tr><tr bgcolor="#336699"><td align="left" valign="middle" style="color: #FFFFFF;">Cruising through suburbia, trying to act ghetto</td><td style="color: #FFFFFF; font-weight:bold;" align="left" valign="middle">avengedxashes</td></tr><tr bgcolor="#336699"><td align="left" valign="middle" style="color: #FFFFFF;">Just divorced 2nd spouse</td><td style="color: #FFFFFF; font-weight:bold;" align="left" valign="middle">soothingburrito</td></tr><tr bgcolor="#336699"><td align="left" valign="middle" style="color: #FFFFFF;">Evading child support</td><td style="color: #FFFFFF; font-weight:bold;" align="left" valign="middle">elvenarcheress</td></tr><tr bgcolor="#336699"><td align="left" valign="middle" style="color: #FFFFFF;">In school</td><td style="color: #FFFFFF; font-weight:bold;" align="left" valign="middle">el_shabutie</td></tr><tr bgcolor="#336699"><td align="left" valign="middle" style="color: #FFFFFF;">Successful with a 6 digit salary</td><td style="color: #FFFFFF; font-weight:bold;" align="left" valign="middle">el_shabutie</td></tr><tr bgcolor="#003366" height="5"><td colspan="2"></td></tr><tr bgcolor="#003366"><td colspan="2" align="center" valign="middle"><input ... > </td></tr><tr bgcolor="#003366"><td colspan="2" align="center" valign="middle"></td></tr></table></td></tr></table>Fun Quizzes at Blog Quiz</form> </div>
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| i guess i'm just vindicated |
[08 Feb 2005|06:03pm] |
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Hope, dangles on a string Like slow spinning redemption Winding in and winding out The shine of it has caught my eye Roped me in so mesmorizing And so hypnotizing I am captivated I am...
Vindicated I am selfish, I am wrong I am right, I swear I'm right Swear I knew it all along And I am flawed But I am cleaning up so well I am seeing in me now The things you swore you saw yourself
So clear Like the diamond in your ring Cut to mirror your intention Oversized and overwhelmed The shine of which has caught my eye And rendered me so isolated So motivated, I am certain now That I am..
Vindicated I am selfish, I am wrong I am right, I swear I'm right Swear I knew it all along And I am flawed But I am cleaning up so well I am seeing in me now The things you swore you saw yourself
So turn up the corners of your lips Part them and feel my finger tips Trace the moment, fall forever Defence is paper thin Just one touch and I'd be in too deep now to ever swim against the current
So let me slip away, so let me slip away So let me slip away, so let me slip against the current So let me slip away, so let me slip away So let me slip away, so let me slip away
Vindicated I am selfish, I am wrong I am right, I swear I'm right Swear I knew it all along And I am flawed But I am cleaning up so well I am seeing in me now The things you swore you saw yourself
Like hope, dangles on a string Like slow spinning redemption
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| ::sigh:: |
[31 Jan 2005|11:41pm] |
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I'm strange And you're strange Don't want you to change No way Ah ha ha ah
Why can't I explain Flying to the sun Without a plane When you're here Ah ha ha ah
And don't you worry 'bout me babe Cuz I'm right here For you to say Hope you know You inspire me You're a flower And I'm a bee I need you Ah ha ha ah
All this You do for free Give me hope And I can see You're so true Ah ha ha ah
And don't you Worry bout me babe Cuz I'm right there For you to say
All the day All the time You and I know You're the waves of my ocean Here's my ring and my devotion All the time All the time You and I know You're the waves of my ocean Here's my ring and my devotion
Ah ah ah ah Ah ah ah ah You're so true Ah ah ah ah Ah ah ah ah
Ah ah ah ah Ah ah ah ah You're strange And I'm strange Don't want you to change No way How can I explain Flying to the sun Without a plane When you're here Ah ha ha ha
And don't you worry 'bout me babe Cuz i'm right here For you to say Don't you worry 'bout me babe Cuz I'm right here For you to say
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| hmmm |
[24 Jan 2005|10:41pm] |
Your Element Is Earth |

You excel at planning and strategizing. You could be a champ at chess or Survivor.
Well grounded, you are able to be realistic and rationalize. On the inside, you have a hard core. It's tough to phase you.
You are super productive, and you are able to think anything through. Focused and super charged, your instincts are a good guide for your next step.
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| this is how i've been waking up |
[20 Jan 2005|09:39am] |
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we're now up here alone terror on the intercom can someone save us systems malfunction blast it this damn machine over and out captain something lurks creeps on the counter top somewhere behind you parasitic cyst i can't stand to watch it's coming up and out of your chest
remember when we were young sit up right on the table a photograph of earth feeding me a way back frightened i tear alone or maybe not the the only one there hello... hello when it rings will you answer? there corner tall short stance it's you come on kill me!! you made a good friend to me but while you were outnumbered and torn they made us do good things...
dear god, i don't feel alive when you're cut short of misery will you pray it be the end? give a look surprise wide eyed to me then you'll know just what i am the scare that triggers your fear come know me in a different light come know me as god
run sand hourglass in my time will i be worth? spin 'round carousel when your horse isn't screwed in
dear god, i don't feel alive when you're cut short of misery (raise forth lost cause) will you pray it be the end? give a look surprise wide eyed to me (raise forth lost cause) then you'll know just what i am (subtle demise the legitimate cry) the scare that triggers your fear come know me in a different light come know me as god (raise forth lost cause)
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| face to face |
[06 Jan 2005|11:36pm] |
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she draws her jagged sword..to face her ultimate enemy..the one that triggers all her fears and insecurity..she draws her sword...at her true enemy..her really nemesis..scared and bleeding her foe lift its head.."have you come to challenge me once more..?"..the girl knows what this demon speaks of ..she lifts her head .." i will put an end to your suffering.."..the demon smirks.."don't you mean yours?"..the girl attacks head on butt the demonis not as weak as she think it might have been.."this love has made you weaker..slower..i will rid you of this burden and.."..the girl strikes again.."No!..this love..i don't want it to go away!!..it's not like it use to be!!"...the demon strikes..
"look at you..you sound like an abused spouse..how certian are you that you're the only one she sees right now..she said that to you before and you ate it up..your stupid naive self!!"
the girl falls to the ground..breathless..how sure could she be?..who's to say she's not being played right now?..."love..."
the girl closes her eyes..that voice..it's so relieving..
"love your the only one who believes in me.."
"love you don't know how important you are to me" "love you trust me right?"
"right?"
the girl lifts herself up..she wobbles..and grabs her sword..she lifts it up..with tears in her face with all her might she yells..
" i do.."
the demon looks at the now little girl with confusion..a form this demon has never seen before..
" what do you speak of?"
the girl points her blade at the demon..
"you know..i don't know why i'm so certain that she see's only me...i'm not beautiful..i'm super emotional..i don't have a care..i don't give good advice..i'm not good at anything and i'll never be good enough for her..but for some reason she's still with me..she made me human.."
the demon rises in anger
"and thats why you hurt thats why you're different..you never know how to feel about anything you never notice the hurtfull things she's doing to you and yet you stand hear defending her!!.."
"SHUT UP!!..no one said it was going to be easy..this is something i accepted a year ago ..i would rather hurt from love a billion times than to be dead..lifeless..a walking ghost..if she is hurting me on purpose..if she is being unfaithful..than she will pay for it..But not by my hands..i see her and i feel like she really loves me.."
"BAH! she'll leave you after she's done milking you..you're nothing but a convenience to her..she'll always put a beautiful person before you..she only see's how you can benefit her..and your just going along with!"
the girl falls again...
"that maybe true..but you'd have to be completely empty to do something like that to anybody..i want you to rest now..i know you hurt...and i'm sorry..i'm so sorry..but i promise you..i will make you're suffering en.."
the demon strikes with tears
"SHE BETRAYED YOU ONCE ALREADY!!WHY MUST WALK INTO THE LION'S FANGS AGAIN!!...THE PAIN WE ENDURED!!..WE LOOKED LIKE FOOLS....we must you risk it again!! what's to say she's not empty..you can't endure anymore pain..i can't!!"
the girl swings her sword
"but nothing is ever certain...that's what it means to live..i love her..i fell in love with who she has become..and if i am being deceived than i hope she gets what coming to her..but for some reason i feel like she's not.."
the demon falls
"i feel like she is...she has replaced you and you don't even see it.."
everthing is still... the girl has drawn her sword at her ultimate enemy and the one thing that she doesn't know how to defeat...her sword is drawn at the neck of her enemy...
"please leave us be...i don't want to live in insecurities anymore..i don't want to feel nervous everytime she doesn't call or sounds uninterested in what i'm saying..i want to be normal.."
..at the neck of her true enemy...
"fool...you can't.."
...herself..
...tammy...
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| tonight...tonight... |
[15 Dec 2004|09:49pm] |
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finally..a real post..like you guys care..heh..anyway sorry i've been kinda not here for months with work and school and stuff i guess i kinda forgot about the journal..well alot but then again not alot has happened..my woman has stopped talking to denise..i'm proud of her..but i know this isn't the end..anywho i failed all my classes in college..but i met alot of interesting ppl..my loved moved out into the little back room..it's a really nice place..the bed kinda sucks..mmmmm what else what else...oh yeah jorge came back and it's been really fun...but...lately i've been feeling unimportant and unexistent..like i'm fading away..i sometimes wonder if maybe..if i wasn't melested..maybe i wouldn't feel like this..lately i've been feeling like there's something deep down spreading inside me..like if i ripped through my skin and into myself i could grab it and pull it out..it's something i could do without..it really sucks cause i know my woman has to put up with it..and i feel like it ruins her day..and i guess i just don't feel like..i feel like a chore sometimes..and i hate myself for it...grrrrrrrrr..i can't blame this on being melested..i hate doing that..ehhhhhhhhhhh ...heh if i was just a little bit stronger..alittle bit smarter..alittle bit thinner..then maybe........
my poor live journal is but a mere scape goat to me...
..sorry journal...but i won't call you stupid =)...
ahhhhh what a great way to come back huh?
...tammy...
can you see tha caution tape?
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| para mi amor |
[13 Dec 2004|08:40pm] |
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mood |
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Cuando tu estas conmigo es cuando yo digo que valió la pena todo todo lo que yo he sufrido no se si es un sueño aún o es una realidad pero cuando estoy contigo es cuando digo que este amor que siento es por que tu lo has merecido con decirte amor que otra vez he amanecido llorando de felicidad a tu lado yo siento que estoy viviendo nada es como ayer Abrazame que el tiempo pasa y el nunca perdona ha hecho estragos en gente como en mi persona abrazame que el tiempo es malo y muy cruel amigo abrazame que el tiempo es oro si tu estas conmigo abrazame fuerte muy fuerte y mas fuerte que nunca siempre abrazame hoy que tu estas conmigo yo no se si esta pasando el tiempo o tu lo has detenido asi quiero estar por siempre aprovecho que estás tu conmigo te doy gracias por cada momento de mi vivir tu cuando mires para el cielo por cada estrella que aparezca amor es un te quiero abrazame que el tiempo hiere y el cielo es testigo que el tiempo es cruel y a nadie quiere por eso te digo abrazame muy fuerte amor mantenme asi a tu lado yo quiero agradecerte amor todo lo que me has dado quiero corresponderte de una forma u otra a diario amor yo nunca del dolor he sido partidario pero a mi me toco sufrir cuado con quien crei en alguien que juro que daba su vida por mi abrazame que el tiempo pasa y ese no se detiene abrazame muy fuerte amor que el tiempo en contra viene abrazame que Dios perdona pero el tiempo a ninguno abrazame que a el no le importa saber quien es uno abrazame que el tiempo pasa y ese nunca perdona ha hecho estragos en mi gente como en mi persona abrazame que el tiempo es malo y muy cruel amigo abrazame muy fuerte amor
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